Revelations...

Did you know that turbans are actually very advanced blocking devices?
Now the logical question would be "Blocking what, Dr. Manbous?" Well I'll tell you if you get me a Guinness first.
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Screw it, it's taking too long, I'll get my own. Gee, service really sucks here...
Ok, so here it is. After careful study and some ground work, I can honestly say that I have discovered the answer to the age-old question: "Why, in Buddha's name do Muslim men wear turbans?" There were many speculations as to why they would wrap a piece of fabric around their head, and most of them involved some kind of ritualistic belief. I've heard of some folks who truly believed that turbans were meant to keep the hair humid during times of high heat so it wouldn't burn... Others thought that it was purely a fashion statement... Without making any judgment on the IQ of these people, I can only say that they were way off.
The only logical (and true!) explanation is this: it is a highly sophisticated device designed to block mind-reading waves. I know, it seems a little strange, and even scary. But trust me, I know what I'm talking about.
And as a good scientist, I am obligated to provide proof if I want some credibility, right? Well I have that proof. As I mentioned earlier in the article, I did some ground work in addition to studying the matter. That ground work put me in direct contact with some of these men, and that's when I was able to prove my theory: never once did I successfully read their mind! I tried many times, using various techniques, and none of my mental probes broke through!
So there it is, ladies and gents, the absolute and irrevocable proof that turbans are not only fashionable items, but in fact very advanced brainwave-blocking technology.

Toucans are the best kind of birds

Well, according to the lack of comments on my last entry, I guess my only reader finally gave up on me... Oh well, less pressure, which means I can finally say whatever I want!!
The title kind of gave away the subject I wanted to talk about... But I do seriously believe that toucans are very cool. Not only are they pretty rare, which means that if some sucker wants a toucan for a pet he (or she) better be stinkin' rich, but they ARE the proud emblem of the wonderful Guinness®. I've heard of people who own parrots and other kinds of birds, but all these flying pets are no match for a sturdy toucan.
You know what? I just realized I have some kind of obsession with animals... Nearly all my stories are about animals to some extent... and the weird thing is I never owned a pet! I owned a horse for a couple of years, but that hardly qualifies as a pet. It's much more than that. I would say it's more like a friend, a partner, and even (for some deeply disturbed people) a lover.
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Yhar... you didn't expect that, did you? hehe...
I like to keep my audience on its toes. Speaking of which... What's up with that foot fetish? Can anybody tell me what's the big sexual pleasure in licking someone's toes? If they were covered with Guinness®, maybe... But the only reason some Guinness® should be on anybody's toes would be that some drunken Irish dude spilled some while being hit by an airplane... after a gargantuan earthquake of course.
So anyway, since I'm finally free to say whatever I want, here it is:
Patate Poil Gneugneugneu
AAAhh... sure feels good! Like a sunday morning with no one around, just walking around in my underwear, scratching my... head...

So there you go
Sweet dreams all you beautiful people... and you too