Albert has a thing for Guinness

Albert is my beer fridge gnome. I named it like that because I don't have much imagination.
Don't worry, I'm not going to insult your intelligence by explaining what a beer fridge gnome is. Almost everybody who wants to protect their valuable beer hires one of these pointy-eared blue critters. No, I'm here today to share with you my latest Guinness-related adventure.
I noticed recently that Albert was getting a little bit ill-tempered whenever I reached in the fridge. At first I thought that he was going through a difficult phase in his life, like puberty, but then I remembered that gnomes are immortal. Silly me... So why was he getting more aggressive every day? I decided to ask him, even though we don't speak the same language, which obviously looks like a considerable obstacle. I noticed over the years that I seemed to be more comfortable with other languages when I was slightly drunk. So I went to the fridge, pulled up a stool and opened the fridge to grab a Guinness. As soon as my hand approached the black can, Albert jumped out from behind another brand of beer and bit my thumb.
Now everyone knows that the only way to flush out the poison delivered by a gnome bite is to rub peanut butter on it while listening to Bob Marley. While I very much enjoy his music, I hate peanut butter, which means I don't have any in my house. So the poison made its way to my brain, which induced a momentary lapse of reason. I went for another brand of beer instead. Yes, I admit it, I do keep other brands, but they are FOR THE GUESTS!!!
And that's when I realized that Albert had a thing for Guinness.
Now I keep only one can of it in the beer fridge (so Albert can enjoy life), and the rest is in the kitchen fridge.
Experience, my friends. Learn from it.

Tata